Blog 54 s..."To Infinity..."
This week the ‘Cutie-pie’ has to write about a journey
for part of his English homework. It had to be something other than just
getting on a train to Blackpool. It had to be interesting with details of the people,
the transport, the type of journey, any problems incurred by the journey etc.
etc.
Homework is essential, I know, I set enough in my career
as a teacher…but what really bothers me is the type of homework and just how
significant it really is. He was totally at a loss as to how to approach this homework. Anyway, we all sat down to our evening meal on Sunday
night and the homework was the main topic of conversation…luckily I wasn’t
having wine so my memory was almost clear when the banter began…
In the year I was to turn 40 I had an
insurance policy maturing…it was nothing major and wouldn’t have made much
difference to the mortgage. So, in the January of that year I decided I would treat us to a holiday of a
lifetime and we sat down with travel brochures to plan something exciting. As I
was only getting the money in the November I foolishly thought we had to wait
until then to book something but a chance telephone call that night with my
youngest brother opened up a whole new world…we could book, pay a deposit and
then pay in full nearer the departure date. Yeah! That cleared, we talked about
where we would like to go and the conversation led us to the decision that there
really was only one place…Disney World Florida… for Christmas...sorted!
My younger brother took his own advice and decided to
come with us…when we talked with two very close friends they decided to come
also…and of course we couldn’t leave ‘Bridezilla’ behind even though she didn’t
live full time with us at that point. So we booked the holiday and a full 10
months of planning began.
Our choice of holiday company meant that we had to fly
from Gatwick …as we were travelling with Virgin it was ideal to book the train
journey down via Virgin train and have our seats booked…then also the transfer
from Euston to Gatwick…and due to the timing of flying we booked in at the
Gatwick Airport hotel…great: we would arrive the night before the flight, stop
over, have a swim in the hotel pool, enjoy an evening meal and literally walk
through from the hotel to the airport following breakfast the next day; holiday
of a lifetime here we come!
I was at the time still teaching and the holiday was
during the Christmas period so there was no problem; I would finish as normal on
the last school day of the term and the ‘Hubby’ would collect me and we would
go straight to the train station to meet our friends and my brother…the return
journey in the January was on the Sunday afternoon and the Monday was a
teacher-trainer day but the Headmaster wavered it and said I could return on
the Tuesday…but sadly exit the Headmaster half-way through the year, enter new
Headmistress equipped with new dates for the school calendar. I had to inform
her that I would not be available the first week of the school holidays for a
newly planned extra training day as I would be in Florida…not a problem was the
reply…phew…er no, ‘ no problem at all you will be able to join the family on
the Tuesday’. WHAT?
In tears I fled home that night, how can I fly to America
on my own? How could the ‘Hubby’ cope with children, cases, transfers? We went
into the travel agents: worse news possible…there was no flight available that
Tuesday in the December, I could be on standby and possibly get out by the
Christmas Eve… 5 days AFTER everyone else had arrived but there was no
guarantee; everything was booked; I could try getting to Newcastle to join a
plane…or the Midlands but there was nothing from Gatwick or Manchester.
OMG. My dream
holiday crashed before my eyes, this was all too much and I sat crying in front
of the travel agent not knowing what we could do.
To cut a very long story short I appealed to the new
Headmistress and eventually settled on an agreement that I would take a drop in
pay for the day I was not available at the beginning of the Christmas holiday
and the day at the beginning of the new school term. Back on track I set about
organising clothes, cases, new lesson plans for the new school term, reports
for the end of term, Christmas cards, presents for the grandparents who would
not be seeing us over the Christmas period, clearing the fridge, cancelling
papers and leaving spare house keys with neighbours…before we knew it we were
ready and raring to go and see Mickey Mouse!!!
We all met up at the train station that Friday night
tea-time; there had been some great
organising due to the ‘Bridezilla’ needing picking up along with her passport containing
a letter of permission to take her out of the country as her surname was
different to ours; our friends needed to finish work and get to the station and
then of course the younger brother who is always late but this time arrived on
cue with the help of the older brother…
“My God, you look like Judy Garland,” was a comment from
my dear friend’s husband when he saw my luggage; well I had gone overboard I
must admit, with two large cases, two medium cases and a special hand luggage
holdall…all in matching brown plaid not to mention the small rucksack with
toys, sweets, change of clothes; travelling with a toddler is not easy!
We all stood on the platform like something out of a war
time movie: an evacuation!
We were excited, I was nervous, the children were beside
themselves with talk of Disney; Buzzlight-year in particular and the young
‘Bridezilla’ wanted to see Tigger.
We waited.
We became cold, tired, hungry and confused; where was our
train? Of course it was December, it was freezing and the trains were
delayed…frozen points and all that malarkey…the station was full of people
desperate to get home after work, full of students who had broken up for the
Christmas break and in amongst them all we stood surrounded by a mountain of
luggage. A train arrived but it wasn’t ours…we were advised to get it anyway as
the next one to London would be seriously delayed and full…even though we had
booked our seats. So we struggled, we grabbed what spaces we could and the
others stood whilst I held a sleeping a toddler on one knee and my designer
holdall on the other.
Phew! We were on our way…
Thing is though this train stopped at Watford Gap where
we had to change trains…no no no!! I had organised the train journey so that
there was no changing of trains and faffing about with children and luggage…off
we were put and struggled across the platform to the awaiting train which was
also full to busting…I know now why it’s called Watford Gap one look down at
the gap between the train and the platform was enough to make me freeze…my God
I could drop my toddler trying to stretch across that gap with luggage:
hysteria began to show on my face and everyone grabbed extra bags and the
‘Hubby’ took the sleeping toddler and they all jumped on to the train…leaving
me dithering on the edge…my friend’s husband has never travelled with me before
and he was beginning to think he’d never travel with me again…outstretched hand
and I was on the train…just as well as it began to take off!
Calm, we were able to eventually sit together and watch
the luggage…I felt excited…we were on our way…yippee! What did I hear from the
conductor? What did I hear the ‘Hubby’ agreeing to? Oh, there was no way that
we were getting off at Victoria, using the underground, getting another tube to
the airport connection…absolutely NOT. I had planned it all to the finest point which did
not include anymore trains, underground or otherwise…there was no way we had to
make our way across London at this time of the night…I wanted to speak to
someone in authority…the conductor left pretty sharpish with the comment; “Do
you think Richard Branson would put up with this? No I should think not…”
ringing in his ears.
Everyone stared, tears rolling down my face assured them they
were right…this travel plan was too much for me…I could no longer cope…I would
never be able to get across London and on an underground tube with my beautiful
luggage in tow and a sleeping toddler and a grumpy teenager…what was the plan
now? Before they came up with a solution we were given wonderful news; the
Virgin trains would pay for us to be collected at the gates and driven across
London in taxis to the hotel at Gatwick…ah! Honour restored; Mr. Branston, as
he was then, would not be getting a letter from me…smooth journey to the
hotel…safe and in one piece. Thank you Sir!
Arriving at the hotel everyone was exhausted but amused
to see all the Christmas party revellers…no time for a meal or a swim…just
sleep to dream of a wonderful holiday…actually not much sleep for our friends
as they had invited the younger brother to join them in their room on the
couch…biggest mistake they ever made…we could hear his snoring from across the
hallway!!!
Well, the ‘Cutie-pie’ refused offers of help with this
journey’s story…so I began recounting the return trip whereby the ‘Intelligent-one’
had his brand new, never before seen in England, walking, talking
Buzzlight-year in his rucksack; as we got to the top of the steps into the
plane someone nudged the backpack and a voice called…”To Infinity…and Beyond..”
to the amusement of most of the staff and passengers…no the ‘Cutie-pie’ didn’t
want this tale either.
Me: “But why not? We can help you get it all down on
paper…”
‘Cutie-pie’: “It’s no good…
‘Hubby’; “Why not son?”
‘Cutie-pie’: “…because I’m not in those stories…it’s got
to be a journey I made…”
Dear Lord how is it we can get confused so early in to
our middle age years…of course the toddler was the ‘Intelligent-one’ as the
‘Cutie-pie’ only came along later that year!
So we tried to tempt him to write about journeys to
Skegness, [all of us plus fishing gear in the Kia] Teddington- Lock [yes I did
go on the underground in the rush hour, complete with buggy and hat box] Morpeth
[with granddad and nana, suits, hat boxes, lego, wedding presents…thankfully in
a hired Picasso!] No, he didn’t want these stories either nor did he want the
tale of the return journey from Disney when he was an 18 month old and we flew
from Florida to Chicago on route to England…someone had told the ‘Hubby’ it was cheaper that way…and the ‘Cutie-pie’
had a stomach bug which meant all contents of his bowels were leaking in all directions and due to the
5 hour delay at Chicago I had run out of pull ups and there were none in the
departure lounge shop so I had to buy swimming pants for toddlers [actually
very good…] but was down to the last pair as we were boarding and on the signal
for belts to be fastened and the Captain’s greeting I smelled something
familiar and realised that the ‘Cutie-pie’ was leaking profusely. I rose
quickly from my seat.
“Excuse me ma’m, you need to return to your seat…”
“But I just need the bathroom… [picked that saying up
on holiday…much more polite…]
“I’m sorry ma’m but we are about to take off…the
Captain…”
“I need to get this little one to the bathroom…as you can
see he is shit up to the nines… “ [not quite as polite…] but effective; she
recoiled at the sight of the poo running down his legs and my shirt and the
smell…no further discussion and she offered wet ones and napkins which I used
to help clean him up with…not quite like the napkins here at home!
As you can guess the ‘Cutie-pie’ was not going to use
that journey story.
We have a million tales…well you do don’t you; trains are
always delayed, flights are re-routed, weather affects us if it’s too cold or
too hot…but he really wasn’t for writing about any of these until the
‘Intelligent-one’ said:
“What about the
smoothie-maker?”
Now there lies a tale…
Blog 54 t…coming soon…next Wednesday…
Copyright ©GML 2012.
Very funny !
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